Medical Mystery

So last week was pretty crazy. I had planned on taking the girls to the zoo on Friday morning, the 25th, cuz there was a special sun safety fair going on. I'm all about hitting up kid friendly events, and I love having things on my calendar. So we got up and got ready, but I was just dragging. My belly was SO bloated and yucky, and I couldn't stay off the toilet (sorry if that's TMI, but that's the story of my life these days. It's either constipation woes or diarrhea). I kept having to tell Cami "K, we'll leave in just a little bit, hang tight!" But finally I realized we were not going to make it there. I called Bree to ask if she'd come help get the girls lunch and naps, cuz I was just miserable. Of course she came to the rescue (I have the most amazing sisters and sister-in-laws in the world!) and I crashed on the couch.

By the time Jake got home that evening, my stomach was bigger than it ever had been, and I was in a lot of pain and discomfort. He asked if I needed to go to the hospital, but I said "nahhhh I don't need that. Maybe just an enema." So he went out and bought one (they're super fun if you've never tried one. Yeah right...don't do it). But right at the last minute, he talked me into going to the ER. *Better Safe Than Sorry* has become our trusty motto.

Jake's parents came over at 11:00 that night to stay with the girls, and we headed to the IMC ER. I was nauseous, in pain, and bloated out like a basketball. After getting checked in, they gave me morphine for the pain (I do quite like the light-headed buzz it gives you, I must say), and Zofran for the nausea. In the room across from ours, there was a crazy homeless guy who was screaming bloody murder nonstop for the few hours we were there. Not pleasant. They told me they wanted to do a CTscan, but that I would need to drink a bottle of yellow contrast juice over the next hour. Blugghhh when you're nauseous, that's not the thing you want to do. So I only drank about 1/3 of it, and they said that was ok. Thank goodness. 

The CTscan of my abdomen showed that my intestines, stomach and rectum were all severely enlarged and distended, and the walls were stretched paper thin. They didn't know if there was an obstruction or what, but the surgeon came in and bluntly said that it was a double edged sword: If they did surgery, it would be very dangerous and could cause perforation, but if they didn't do it and I needed it, I'd be in trouble. K thanks doc. So they went another route, and decided to put a big old tube down my nose, throat, and into my stomach. Worst. Thing. Ever.

But as soon as they placed it, they suctioned out tons of fluid that had been sitting in my stomach. (Gross). And I immediately started to feel better. I was admitted to the hospital early Saturday morning, with the lovely suction tube and an oxygen tube in my nose, hooked up to vitamins and TPN. And doped up on morphine. I was asleep for most of the day, and when I was awake, I was pretending to be asleep. ;) That tube hurt my throat SO bad, and I did not want to talk to anyone. Swallowing was excruciating. It didn't help that I got nauseous the first time I got up to go to the bathroom, and throwing up with that tube in was not fun. I sure got a lot of that stomach gunk out though, so that was good. Apparently the tube hadn't been suctioning right. Glad we got that cleared up.

I was NPO, which means nothing by mouth, which means life sucks. But hey, I had Jake and his dad by my side all day Saturday, which I really appreciated. The girls were at Grandma's, so I didn't need to worry about them. I just missed them. I sure was glad my TV had TLC- my favorite hospital channel! Cake Boss marathon- woo hoo!

Sunday morning came, and I was miserable. I'd stopped taking the morphine, so as not to get addicted or whatever, but my throat killed. Bree and Cassity came to visit in the morning, and then the nice LDS branch members came around with the sacrament. I wasn't able to actually "partake", but I touched the bread and water to my lips like they told me to. I'm glad I got to at least do that. Ohhh the things we take for granted. I was also supposed to be giving a talk in our ward that day, which I clearly had to ditch out on. Sorry Bishop.

Later that day, they finally pulled the suction tube since it seemed to have done its job, and I was a much happier woman after that. I could swallow and talk again! They put me on a clear liquid diet (I've been on this diet so many times now I'm a pro), so I started with some chicken broth, strawberry jello, and apple juice. They all tasted divine, but they still left me feeling yucky and crampy. Boooo. My intestines are just angry. Damaged and angry.

While at the hospital, we talked to numerous doctors, surgeons, gastro specialists, a dietician, and a rheumatologist. Each one asked me questions and then threw their hands up and said they didn't know what it could be. Not very encouraging. I understand that everyone is trying their best to figure this out, but it's just frustrating that we still don't have any answers. 

On Monday, it was very interesting. Two ladies came in and announced that they were going to insert a PICC line for TPN, which we hadn't gotten the memo about. After a few minutes of uncertainty and confusion and saying "Uhh did the doctor order this? Cuz we didn't know about it", the ladies left and the hospital doctor came in. He said they had considered either TPN or a feeding tube at this point to get me nourished. I told him that a feeding tube was something I dreaded, which he respected, and he explained that TPN wouldn't be the best option for longterm. So he ended up saying, "Well, we're going to send you home today, since you have an endoscopy and colonoscopy scheduled for tomorrow with your gastroenterologist at a different hospital." And that was that.

I went home that day, drank clear liquids, did my lovely colonoscopy prep, and had my two scopes the next day. Usually I enjoy these things because I love the feeling of being knocked out with propofol. But this time, after they had to poke me like 4 times to get the dang IV in, I woke up right after it was done and just wanted to go back to sleep. I didn't want to be awake. I was itchy and agitated and cold and uncomfortable. They hadn't found anything abnormal, so there were no more answers than before. I was just frustrated, and tired of all of this.

The bright spot in all of this crap was on Monday after I got home from the hospital, and Jake's parents brought the girls back to our house. I was sitting in the recliner when Cami walked in the door, and a huge bright smile lit up her face and she ran over to me saying "Mommy!" and gave me a big hug. Ohhh how I love my sweet little girls. Lexi was just as happy and smiley as ever, and I just thought, THIS is what I'm fighting for.

This little girl

 And this little girl

And this man, who is always always always by my side. (And who turned 31 on May 13- Mother's Day. Happy Birthday my sweet boy)

So let's get me healthy please.

 The latest is...

-I went to another neurologist (last one was in November), and he seemed to bring a fresh perspective. He had me do a nerve test where they shock and poke nerves and muscles in your arms and legs. He also ordered a brain MRI, which I did yesterday and will find out the results for hopefully tomorrow.

-I met with a registered dietician at IMC and we went over all my symptoms and what I've been eating and lab results galore. She helped me understand that right now the most important thing is for me to get nourished, however that may be, so that I can function and take care of my family and still be HERE. In order to do that, I need to give my stomach and bowels a rest, which means the best option is a feeding tube. She ordered a few swallowing tests for me to do this week, and a feeding tube is scheduled to be placed on Thursday. Blahhhhhh. But I'll do what I have to do.

-I'm meeting with an Iritis specialist at the Moran Eye Center this week, and maybe he'll bring something new to the table and let us know how my silly eyes are doing.

-In the meantime, I'm avoiding gluten and dairy, and trying to stuff my face full of good stuff but also yummy stuff because I don't know what the future holds with me and eating. It's such a weird time.

-The Mayo Clinic is still in our minds and a likely possibility. We're just going to kind of wait and see how this week goes and what the results are of all these tests. 

I will keep you posted. Thanks for all your love, concern, encouragement and prayers. It means the world to me. I don't know why all this is happening, and if there's an end in sight yet, but I've got lots of things keeping me going. Family, friends, hope, faith, testimony, love. Even though it's more than I ever thought I'd have to endure, I know it's making me a better person and I can get through this. I've shed a lot of tears in the past little while, but I'm still smiling, too.

See? :)